Run Out Parsley .. No Probs

I Once Witnessed A Chef Drying Out Finely Chopped Grass ( Freshly Picked That Morning ) and Drying It Under The Hotlight Because They Ran Out Of Parsley For A Function .. You Wont See That On Blue Peter

Season the Floor

I had spilt some oil on the floor so after wipeing it up I was sprinkleing some salt over it to prevent anyone slipping, when one of the chefs asked 'why do you season the floor? is it incase you drop something??'

Squeeze Them Lemons

I don't think so, was makeing lemon sorbet and the recipe said use 2 thirds fresh squeezed lemon juice that was about 40 lemons. Yea right whatever, like i'm gonna stand there squeezing 40 lemons, so instead chucked them in the blender to a pulb then passed the mix through a fine sieve. Job Done!!!!

Elastic Band Soup!!!!!!

I once seen a chef makeing asparagus soup, had his base all made up, and was throwing the aspargus in the pot with the rubber bands still on, when i asked him why. he replied 'i'm going to blend the soup then pass it through a strainer, so what was the point of removing the bands?'

Poor Vegitairians

Brings a little smile to my face when i think abot the vegi's that come and eat of the carvery, they ask for, the veggi nut roast, then fill up on cauli cheese and creamed leeks, lottsa roast pots. unknown that the white sauce is made from chicken stock, and the roasts pots cooked in duck fat. but they enjoy the veggi gravy.